You’ve been cordially invited to break your heart.
Child sponsorship has always seemed like a very safe way to help another person. Most of the time you never look them in the eye.
But today I met our family’s sponsored child. All the safe distance of sponsorship was completely obliterated. Now all the “ideas” of sponsorship were humanized into a six-year-old boy. His name is Hector.
The first crack came as the elevator doors opened at 7:15am. Before I even saw him I knew: my heart is already breaking. I could feel it—the tears rushing into my eyes, the heat in my face, the tightness in my chest. I came around the corner where he was waiting for me with his eyes closed, a nervous smile on his face.
You can see what happens next. In true-to-Molly fashion: it was loud, there was lots of talking, and I basically just freaked out. And of course, tears.
He opened his eyes and rushed into my already-full arms. But there was room for him. Crack #2.
We made our way to a couch and exchanged muchos regalos (many gifts). He had made a photo book for me, and a calendar with pictures of him for all of 2010. I had a soccer ball for him and a backpack full of fun and practical items.
Then something spectacular happened. Because of the common grace of the internet, an uncommon event was able to occur. We were able to video chat with Abraham, Orison, & Morrow! Watching him interact with my other children… another crack. It was getting bigger and bigger, and we hadn’t even left the hotel.
We spent the morning at a sports day. Wherever I went, Hector came. And his hand was always in mine. As we walked around I tried to take all the mental pictures I could. With each one, more cracking.
We played, we laughed, we ate snacks… I felt like I was hanging out with one of my own kids.
Then after lunch, the inevitable happened. I had to say goodbye. At this point, the one-half of my heart that was now hanging by a fiber came completely disconnected. How do you say goodbye? How do you tell someone (who’s six) all the hopes and dreams you have for him? How do you share the thankfulness you feel to them for sharing their life with you?
I felt crazy as I just wept and wept over the goodbye. And as I’ve thought about it this afternoon, it felt in small part like saying goodbye to another one of my kids. At one point his mother told me to calm down! I mean, she said it lovingly, but isn’t that hilarious? She’s obviously not used to me, the emoting machine.
Hector was added to our extended family a few weeks ago. I got one morning with him. And then, a goodbye. And who knows if I’ll ever see him again. I hope and pray that I do. I kept having fantasies all afternoon of Abraham & I venturing down to El Salvador for Hector’s graduation. And if I don’t see him again on earth, I hope and pray that we will see each other in heaven. There, God-willing, I will see all of my children, even my sponsored children. And we will rejoice, every tear wiped away.
So I guess, sponsorship can be an easy way to help a kid out. But it’s not going to be easy if you engage with more than your wallet. If you engage with your heart and your time, it’ll hurt to not see their smile, hear their voice, watch them grow up. It just might break your heart.
Entry filed under: Compassion.